Monday, May 22, 2006

The Madness Must Cease!

Dear Father Alou:

The Jose Vizcaino Experiment is over. Please, please (oh God, please) stop playing him at first base. In the 9-2 victory over the Cardinals on Monday, he again failed to contribute via the hit, and his average fell to .183. You not only benched Jason Ellison on Friday to play this "hitter" at 1st, but in Monday's game you even benched Mark Sweeney to insert Vizcaino at 1st, a move that is only acceptable if Sweeney has use of neither his legs nor his arms.

We already know that you're fairly close to senility, but a few of us still harbor hope that you may be able to fight off the darkness long enough to contruct a few lineup cards without Vizcaino on them before this year is over. Ray Durham is healthy and playing everyday, Felipe, thus it is expected that the .183-hitting, backup 2nd baseman not play as much.

Sincerely,

Orange & Black Baseball

2 comments:

Andrew said...

Oh, boy, I can't wait to read what you've got to say about Novacaino's performance in game 2 of this series [reaching for my seatbelt].

Daniel said...

Heh. I'm as predictable as the seasons. Heh.